Okay, okay…..in full disclosure here….. the real reason why I woke up in a REALLY, REALLY bad mood is because I didn’t have any HALF & HALF for my coffee today…
Now that I’ve got that out of the way…we can move on to more serious matters i.e. why I AM NOT PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN today!!!
So….while I am sipping my nasty black cup of coffee with no HALF & HALF in it, I turn my TELEVISION on…and….THE FIRST THING i see (on every single EFFIN channel) is our NOBEL PEACE PRIZE WINNING u.s. PRESIDENT obama (in co-hoots with WAR CRIMINALS and BEST FRIENDS FOREVER republicans and democrats) STARTING another UNNECESSARY war of IGNORANT CHOICE paid for by HARD WORKING americans’ taxes WHICH will MOST definitely place MANY, MANY boots on the ground in our NEAR future..
Time to turn my TELEVISION off and turn MY COMPUTER on…and what am I bombarded with on the INTERNET..more war PRESIDENT obama starting another war……Jasmine Tridevil and HER three BOOBS…and, LAST BUT not LEAST…teen mom FARRAH ABRAHAM’S back-door entry FUCKABLE SEX DOLL.
america HAS lost its EFFIN mind…or…maybe i have lost my FUCKING mind…”I DON’T KNOW and I DON’T CARE!” is all I have to say…I mean, perhaps Vice President Joe Biden should have said, “we will chase ISIS to the GATES of AMERICA (instead of hell)!!!!”
Get your POPCORN heeeeeere!!!!!! We are going to WAR again AMERICA…Here’s my proof…the TRAITOROUS WAR CRIMINALS in both OUR republican and democrat parties are TOO cowardly to DEBATE and then PLACE a BINDING vote on this MATTER until AFTER our elections in NOVEMBER…which begs for me to say, “what an EFFIN and insulting JOKE on the american people!!!!”
In regards to JASMINE TRIDEVIL and her 3 boobs…I ask, “Why only 3 boobs and not 8 boobs? 3 boobs on the front..3 boobs on the back….one boob on the forehead..and one boob on the chin (all different sizes)…..NOW THAT IS SEXY!!! Or perhaps, Romney-ama Care (let’s give credit where credit is due yo! Romneycare came before MORE WAR/COPYCAT obamacare) only covers the first 3 boobs WITH a $1,000 dollar deductible..all the other boobs come out of POCKET.
Ok…Ok..I got the munchies real bad right now so I’m gonna keep this real short in regards to the teen mom FARRAH ABRAHAM’S FUCKABLE SEX DOLL (with vibrating ass and pussy)…
“I refuse to purchase this product for false advertising…I do NOT see any VENEREAL DISEASES on that SEX DOLL!!! Like everything else in AMERICA, it’s counterfeit!!!”
When his or her lips start moving…and, I hate to say this…but they are all liars…and, we are all HERE to serve them…and, more of our TAX dollars will be spent on creating more terrorists who hate america in the MIDDLE EAST so that more future generations of AMERICANS will become bankrupt…So, in a nutshell….when you see an american politician’s lips moving, it’s time to change the channel because you know they are lying…This country needs a 3rd party, and it needs ONE very soon..Best friends forever republicans and democrats know this and is the reason why our ELECTIONS are always a CHOICE between 2 TERRIBLE choices…because they are one and the same party who take turns wearing the “BAD GUY” cap whose only purpose is to CIRCLE THE WAGONS on the IGNORANCE and HYPOCRISY of the AMERICAN people
The REAL enemy to BEST FRIENDS FOREVER republicans and democrats is not the MUSLIM terrorists in the MIDDLE EAST…it’s a STRONG middle CLASS in AMERICA…and, it’s for this REASON alone..why BEST FRIENDS FOREVER republicans and democrats constantly START wars in the MIDDLE EAST…Give america’s POLITICIANS credit where credit is due..they have CREATED the PERFECT boogeyman in the MIDDLE EAST…whose only purpose is to ROB the middle class of AMERICA into BANKRUPTCY for generations to come
So…let me get this STRAIGHT!!! Come this November….our congress and senate want us to vote for them when these IMBECILES are incapable of DEBATING and/or VOTING on ANYTHING other than STARTING more WARS…Even more disturbing is how the U.S. MEDIA outlets will be CHIRPING more of their lies to the AMERICAN people again about how “MORE WAR DOES A NATION GOOD!” bullshit propaganda!!!! And….who wants to make a $10,000 dollar MITT ROMNEY bet that when these WAR-BUSTERS we call our LEADERS come back from their EXTRA-PLUSH vacations THAT they will NOT be discussing the ISSUES that matter MOST to AMERICANS (i.e. the economy, the recession, the INCREASING income gap between rich and poor, climate change…JUST to name a few)….I’ll MOST definitely take that bet cause it will be the EASIEST money I will have ever earned…Stay tuned Y’ALL…I’m in the process of developing the PILOT SHOW for “THE 2014 UNITED STATES SEINFELD ELECTION”…the TITLE will be “WAR, WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR!” 🙂
A major research institution has just announced the discovery of the densest element yet known to science. The new element has been named Cantorium. Cantorium had one neutron, 2 Assistant neutrons, 1 Director of Administration neutron, 1 Scheduler neutron, 1 Casework Director neutron, 1 Legislative Director neutron, 1 Legislative Assistant neutron, 1 Policy & Legis Counsel neutron, 1 Policy Adviser neutron, 2 District Representative neutrons, 2 Shared Employee neutrons, 1 Legislative Correspondent neutron, 1 Legislative Assistant neutron, 1 Press Secretary neutron, 1 Senior Adviser neutron, and all the FREAKIN idiots who voted for this LOSER…. giving it an atomic mass of WAY-OVER 350…
These particles are held together by dark forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. The symbol of Cantorium is CU.
Cantorium’s mass actually increases over time as morons randomly interact with various elements in the atmosphere within the Cantorium molecule, leading to the formation of isodopes. This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to believe that Cantorium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration.
Remember that song VIDEO KILLED THE RADIO STAR in the 1980s by the Buggles…Well…Eric Cantor is the PERFECT example of how CITIZENS UNITED is KILLING the DEMOCRACY star
I mean, this EFFIN idiot was at STARBUCKS one-hundred miles outside of his district catering to WALL STREET scumbag LOBBYISTS on the day of his primary election…and was surprised that the very voters who elected him into office didn’t vote for him again…
And, has anyone noticed that there are no MORE townhall CHATS? Probably not….due to the fact that the majority of stupid americans are getting ready to wait on EXTRA long lines in order to get their NEW chinese apple 6 iphones…There are NO MORE townhall chats because OUR POLITICIANS (in both parties) no longer care about the AVERAGE WO/MAN voter…Their only INTERESTS center around the CORPORATE MASTERS they are serving…and who will spend 100s of millions of dollars on their campaigns.
Which will make the 2016 Presidential Election all the MORE interesting..I mean, on one side – they will bring out the PUPPETS with the BOBBLE-HEADS aka the GREAT WHITE DOPES of the REPUBLICAN party duking it out in their PRIMARY…and, on the OTHER side – they’ll break out the other PUPPETS also with the BOBBLE-HEADS aka the SEINFELD democrats WHO constantly BLABBER about their POLITICS of NOTHING…and finally, you will have the libertarian PIPSQUEAK rand paul begging us to VOTE for him AND his “protest WASHINGTON” vote…when we all KNOW this PIPSQUEAK will NEVER run for PRESIDENT…unfortunately for the PIPSQUEAK, the state of kentucky does not allow its SENATORS to run for both THE SENATE and the PRESIDENCY..and we all KNOW politics for the PAUL family is an extremely LUCRATIVE one and has nothing to do with POLITICS…which means THE PIPSQUEAK will take the more PROFITABLE and SAFER course of action and just remain a SENATOR and never even enter into the REPUBLICAN primary
Remember america!!! A nation of SHEEP only BREEDS a government of WOLVES..and CITIZENS UNITED has TURNED both parties into a BUNCH of laughing HYENAS whose only purpose is to stuff their filthy faces with the ROTTEN carcasses of the american people. The laugh is on US america!!!
And even better than being 100% HACKER proof..The ONE-STEP polaroid camera is ALSO 100% NSA proof…even ERIC SNOWDEN would agree with me on this one..So, here’s how the POLAROID works hollywood…it’s very simple. You take a NUDE pictures of yourself…AND THEN…you take those NUDE PICTURES of yourself and you put them in a SAFE (DO NOT! AND I MEAN do not SCAN YOUR polaroids into your computer OKAY) …and VOILA!!! No one can steal your NUDE pics…unless they break into your HOUSE..at which point YOU have every right to blow their BRAINS away..It is really not that complicated HOLLYWOOD..unless that is…you WANT everyone to see your nude photos..
Now, do REALIZE hollywood…It’s very difficult to PHOTOSHOP polaroids…so, you won’t be able to achieve that PERFECT look you guys are so fond of recently.. but hey!!! what are gonna do 🙂