When Drinking Coal Pollutants Tastes Great In West Virginia


Slurp up every drop of that delicious BLACK LICORICE tasting water my fellow American citizens in West Virginia!  No wait!  Even better!  Slurp it all up and then take a nice long, HOT bath in it – just make sure you don’t give any of your CURRENTLY, extra-foul, polluted water to any of your CHILDREN and/or PETS okay!

 Look America….I am not going to get into a long diatribe about how UN-GREAT America has become in just the last 14 years because that would be boring and extra redundant.  I’m just going to get to the point real quick about the false and bogus democracy that we currently have in our country.  In a real DEMOCRACY, the golden rule to follow is PEOPLE always before PROFITS compared to AMERICA’S version of demo-CRAZY where it’s always PEOPLE after PROFITS.  I mean, in just the last 6 months:

  1. We have seen a fertilizer plant explode and obliterate half of a town in TEXAS
  2.  A train filled with oil explode into a huge FIREBALL forcing another ENTIRE small town to flee their homes in the middle of the night in North Dakota/South Dakota
  3. Thousands of Gallons Of Oil Spills in many BUM-FUCK places in America like Arkansas

 Allow me to remind you of one of my own favorite sayings, “It’s always the innocent & beautiful children who suffer the most from the ignorance and hypocrisy of their parents.”  I mean, the proud citizens of the great state of West Virginia lead the nation in BIRTH DEFECTS which forces me to ask myself 2 questions:

  1. Does West Virginia lead the nation in MOTHERS fucking SONS or FATHERS banging DAUGHTERS or BROTHERS humping SISTERS or however INBREDS love to do IT?
  2. Or, could it possibly be because WEST VIRGINIA is PROUD of their COAL/POLLUTION, I mean, IGNORANCE?

 I personally think the answer to either of those questions is rather simple; and, more importantly, is what our government & polluting corporations WILL NEVER tell us – that the most common SIDE EFFECT of drinking polluted, black-licorice tasting, chemical water for generations is AN UNCONTROLLABLE urge to want to fuck YOUR CLOSEST relative in a most perverse, incestuous and biblical way – but that’s just my simple & humble opinion.  Long story short, all of WEST VIRGINIA’S problems means that “ THERE MUST BE SOMETHING IN THE WATER!”

 Oh yea!  Before I forget…allow me to look into my crystally-marijuana BALL and read this country’s near future in regards to our current version of demo-CRAZY and pollution.  First and foremost, there will be no CRIMINAL CHARGES whatsoever for what happened in WEST VIRGINIA.  Secondly, this will happen AGAIN very soon not only in WEST VIRGINIA but in other states as well.  And, last but not least, there will be EVEN more children born in the WEST VIRGINIA with even more BIRTH DEFECTS because in a country whose ETERNAL DREAM is “PROFITS before PEOPLE”; it’s the only way ANYTHING makes CENTS, I mean, sense and dollars


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